I'M TOLD I'M TOO YOUNG

I AM planning to get married next summer, when I will be 18 and my fiancé 20.

My parents refuse to accept the idea and have said they think I’m too young.

They won’t listen when I try to argue with them about it, and we’ve had some furious rows.

They’ve not come right out and said they won’t support me, but they refuse to discuss my wedding plans with me and I think we may just have to go it alone. I’d like them to be a part of it though, but what can I do to convince them I’m serious? -DH

Fiona says: As so many young marriages fail, I’m afraid I can understand your parents’ reluctance.

You say you’ve had some furious rows and you say you want them to be part of this wedding, but have you and your fiance tackled your parents together?

Has he actually told them he wants to marry you - or, better yet, asked their permission to do so?

I know this sounds very old fashioned, but if they haven’t seen any involvement from your fiance in the plans you’re making, that may be what they’re waiting for. It might help if the two of you were to face your parents together, calmly and encourage them to explain what is worrying them.

If they won’t give their support and you are still determined to marry, you will have to make your plans without them.

SHE CAN BE REALLY NOSY

I’M about to go back to work now my little boy’s started at nursery and my sister’s offered to come in and clean for me, as she’s not working at the moment.

I could certainly do with the help and can’t afford to pay anyone the commercial rate, but I’m worried about giving her access to my home when I’m not there. She can be nosy and I’m concerned she might go through my stuff. I don’t know how to tell her without hurting her feelings. - LL

Fiona says: I don’t think you can say anything without causing offence, so either you have to refuse her offer or find some way of ensuring she can’t see your private things.

Many people use a lockable fireproof case to store important papers in and, if you filed away everything you don’t want her to see in that, she need never know you’re hiding them from her.