Porn's ruined love life

I HAVE been looking at internet porn every day since I was 14 or so and now, at 25, I wonder if I will ever be able to have a proper relationship.

Throughout my late teens and early 20s I was still interested in women, but found it hard to be around them. When I did get as far as the bedroom, it was always difficult and on the last occasion I couldn’t keep an erection at all. What’s wrong with me? -DD

Fiona says: Experts who have studied people who view porn all the time have discovered it can, unfortunately, lead to sexual dysfunction, as you have found out for yourself.

Apparently, the problem lies in the brain, which is simply not wired to deal with a heightened state of sexual excitement all the time.

From what you telling me here, it would indicate you have a possible addiction to porn. Like other addictions, it’s left you detached from real people, which is probably why you found it hard to be around real women and couldn’t relate to them.

There are specialist counsellors who can help. The Check out the Association for Treatment of Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity (ATSAC.co.uk).

Does hubby have OCD?

WHY does my husband have to keep checking things? He’s always done it, but over the last year it’s got a lot worse.

When we go out he checks the front door three or four times, and at home, watching TV, he is up and down all evening checking sockets are switched off etc. I love him to bits but this is driving me nuts as I am struggling to get enough sleep.

Most of us have routines and habits that others may find irritating but, for the most part, these are harmless. In your husband’s case though, his routines have become obsessions and I suspect he has an Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, or OCD for short.

Encourage him to speak to his GP who can suggest possible treatments. You may also find it useful to contact OCDAction (ocdaction.org.uk).