How can I help my friend?

 I’ve a friend from college who I met when I started last September. We’re both 19 and on the same course, but her life is very different to mine as her mum is an alcoholic.

She clearly finds this very difficult and has told me about an organisation she’s joined to help the relatives of alcoholics, which has really helped her. I know it’s hard for her to talk about, but she’s become a really good friend and I’d like to understand more about what she’s going through.

Where would be a reliable place to get more information from? - GH

Fiona said: Your friend may belong to Alateen which is the young person’s part of Al-Anon Family Groups UK, for those affected by alcoholism. The organisation provides help and support for relatives and close friends of people with a drink problem.

You may find it helpful to look at their website (al-anonuk.org.uk), especially the podcasts on the site which you may find very informative.

It does you great credit that you want to help and support your friend, but tread cautiously.

No head for heights

It’s probably stupid to write to you about this because there’s nothing you can do, I know.

The thing is, I’m terrified of heights - not just tall buildings or cliffs, but anything above ground level.

It’s mad, but I can’t even stand on a chair to change a light bulb.

Over the years, things have got worse and worse and now my husband has died and I’m on my own, it’s really bad.

My daughter wanted me to go away with her and her family on holiday this summer, but when I saw where they were planning to go, I had to decline as it was all cliffs!

I need help and information as this is ruining my life.

Fiona said: It sounds as if a rational fear of falling from something high has become an irrational phobia. Some people respond to counselling, others find psychotherapy or hypnotherapy suit them best. Anxiety UK, formerly known as the National Phobics Society, is worth contacting too.