A recent health scare (well, a mild bout of sciatica) has made John Shuttleworth reflect on his mortality, and the many things he needs to do before the inevitable move into a hospice. And he plans to share his musings, pearls of wisdom, and, of course, new ditties in My Last Will and Tasty Mint.

Can sole agent, Ken Worthington, pull out the stops and make John a star before his retirement? As befits a man living on borrowed time – John considers life’s major issues: the rise in popularity of hi-viz protective gear, the suitability of the plastic lid on takeaway coffee cups and the excitement he felt when sucking his first mint: “It gave my tongue activity, as the mint’s flavours bore into me, turning my grey world azure blue – I remember my first Polo, do you?”

As well as hilarious new songs, John (aka comic and musician Graham Fellows) will bash out the favourites on his trusty Yamaha: Two Margarines, I Can’t Go Back To Savoury Now, Mutiny Over The Bounty, Y Reg plus many more. And at the end of it all, a question remains: who should John donate his organs to, or should he just sell them on eBay?

Graham Fellows, in his guise as singer extraordinaire John Shuttleworth, comes to the Arts Centre on Wednesday, January 11 at 7.30pm. Tickets are £12. To book go to swindontheatres.co.uk or call 01793 524481.