SWINDON Town striker Charlie Austin has spoken for the first time about the heartbreak of losing his baby earlier this year.

The 21-year-old footballer and his partner of two years, Bianca Parker, were expecting to become parents to a little girl, but their daughter was suffering from the most severe case of cerebral palsy.

Last month, Bianca gave birth to their stillborn daughter, Tayton-Grace Austin, at Swindon’s Great Western Hospital – with Charlie beside her.

“It was horrible. I burst into tears. You just don’t think it’s going to happen to you and then it did and I was like, why?” he said.

“People say everything happens for a reason but there’s no words that can explain it or make me feel any better.”

The couple decided to start a family last Christmas when they were living together on Angel Ridge.

“Football’s been a big help to me because I can get my mind away from it,” he said.

I was concentrating on my football. When I was training everything was fine but as soon as I came away it was still there.”

“It’s something that you’re not going to forget. I was looking forward to it, me and Bianca were looking forward to it.”

“I’ve had people around me to help me through it. I could have gone either way, I could have gone down the depression route but everyone at the club and family and friends and Bianca have helped me,” he said.

His 19-year-old girlfriend, Bianca, said she was devastated by the experience too.

She said: “It brought us closer together. It made us realise at the time how short life is. We got to hold her and spend time with her, we didn’t want to let her go.

“We went back to see her at the chapel of rest.

“We just sat in the hospital crying. We went out for dinner a few days afterwards and there was a new born baby there and we had to leave. Everything reminds you of it.”

“You expect to sort out your baby’s christening, not your baby’s funeral. When you’re young as well you don’t expect it to happen.”

The couple have organised fundraisers for Scope, the cerebral palsy charity, to raise money in memory of their daughter.

There will be a fundraising afternoon at The Village Tavern, Toothill on October 30 at 3pm and a five-hour sponsored walk from the car park at Barbury Castle, Ridgeway, to Uffington White Horse, Aylesbury, on October 31 at 9am.

“We want to do this because of losing Tayton. We haven’t got her here to make a difference and we want to make her proud,” said Bianca.

Charlie said: “I hope people do come, even people that don’t know us it would be nice for people to turn up.”

To make a donation visit www.justgiving.com/bianca-parker or to take part email bianca-parker@hotmail.co.uk.