Ok I know I’m a wordy pedant, but what do you think of this.

As I am out the house most days too early to be healthy, 'The Missus’, like lady muck, gets a wake up phone call every morning from me.

The call is normally between 7-30am and 8-00am, but the other morning when I did my husbandly duty at 8-06am, one of 'da youff' answered the tellingbone.
The conversation went thus

Phone rings then is answered by 'da youff…..ullo
Me…. your mum there?
Youff…. she's on the toilet
Me….ok tell her I phoned.
Youff hangs up without further ado.

It’s not the shortness or bluntness of conversation I comment on here, in fact 'da youff', apart from manners, is coming along quite nicely at 'bloke conversation' on the phone, no it's the choice of words.
'She’s in the toilet' paints a far more pleasant picture in the mind than, 'she's on toilet', surely.

I think 'she's in the bathroom' would be far better a statement describing the lady of the tower's disposition, to be totally pedantic. Am I?
Unless of course, to be coarse she was on the bog.