Virgin Atlantic’s US website has introduced a handy feature for American travellers called Your Name in British.

In their words, "If you're going to fit into British society seamlessly during your visit, you're going to need a guaranteed genuine British name. Here's where you get one, just type your name in the spaces provided, hit the button and discover your name in British."

So I thought I would give it a try. Here’s some of the results …

George Bush ... The Right Honourable Gilfillian Bandy-Beerbohm
Hank Yank ... Sir Hardy Yangtang-Kipperbang
Randy Trailertrash ... Viscount Ron Trenchard-Greenhaugh
Hillary Clinton ... Lady Hermione Curmudgeonly-Smythe
Paris Hilton ...Dame Prunella Hornby-Traneset
Dolly Parton ... Dowager Lady Daphne Prior-Conviction
Stevie Wonder ... The Very Reverend Stan Wibblesworth
Barack Obama ... Viscount Brian Obsidian-Catflap
Angelina Jolie ... Duchess Audrey Jollyfoot
Letters From America ... Earl Lancelot Featherstonehaugh
Xenia Zappa ... Duchess Xaviera Zealand-Pickles

I don’t think Virgin are using any complex software algorithms to run this translation program. In fact just by looking at the above names you can probably figure out how they do it.

It's funny but Virgin Atlantic seem to have this obsession with projecting a sort of sixties Austin Powers version of Englishness.

They refer to their customers as “jeterosexuals” and also have another feature on the US site called More Tea, Vicar in which they discuss the niceties of drinking tea in England which “the whole nation's been potty about” since 1660.

“Each month” they say, “we'll be looking at a very specific English tea and filling you in on the full facts, so that in no time at all, you'll know your assam from your elbow”.

I’m just worried that this sort of sophisticated humour and witty innuendo will be lost on the average American.