Graham Carter - the voice of age and experience

ONCE you get an image in your head, it can be impossible to shift it, and that is especially bad news for you because I am about to ask you to picture me in the shower.

Unfortunately, this is necessary to set the scene for what was an even scarier moment for me than it is for you, now, wrestling with that image.

I finished my shower and was reaching for the towel when I realised I had forgotten to wash my hair, which is always the last bit of me that gets done. How could I forget to do something I do every day?

But then I thought about it and worked out that I had washed it after all - and now my dilemma was much worse.

Now my problem was not forgetting to do it, but rather not remembering that I had.

In short: a minute after doing something, I had no memory of it, and that was worrying indeed.

We all know there is a growing problem with dementia in this country, with 850,000 people now said to be suffering from it.

And if that isn’t bad enough, I also think there is a creeping paranoia affecting millions of others, partly thanks to the media’s fixation with the disease.

Last week’s news included some hyped-up ‘advice’ about supposed preventative measures that, when I read it, turned out to be nothing more than general health tips that I could have written myself.

As a consequence, many of us are now on the lookout for telltale early signs of dementia and are increasingly willing to believe that momentary lapses are evidence that our memories are failing.

That even includes people of my age, who would need to be suffering from a very rare form of the disease to be affected so young.

My wife is one of those people who lives in morbid fear of becoming forgetful.

The other day I was in the kitchen when she walked through the door, took one look at me and turned white.

Even as ugly as I am, this is not the effect I normally have on people.

“What on earth is the matter?” I asked.

“I’ve come in here,” she said, “but I have absolutely no idea why. I think I am losing it.”

In reality, of course, we all have these moments, and they are usually not much to worry about.

In fact, when I thought about it, I came to the conclusion that we should see such experiences as positives.

The reason I had forgotten about washing my hair was that I was completely preoccupied with something else at the time. That is a sure sign of a healthily active and focused brain, not one that is on the blink.

And life is increasingly more challenging to our minds and our memories.

As you get older and your life gets more complex - for example, with the expansion of your family - there is ever more potential for forgetting the trivial things.

And we must also remember that while our lives may not be as hard as our parents’, they are certainly busier and more complex, so it is no wonder some of us temporarily forget where we are and why.

Besides, from personal experience of family members who suffered from dementia, I know that the disease, if it comes, will be far too cruel to grant you any long-range warning signs.

So if you find yourself confused and worried that you are ‘losing it’, my advice to you is, appropriately, to forget it.

Starting with me in the shower, if you can.