Wise words that have helped most of us at some point or another in our lives.

Chatting to friends, talking things through with our partners, running home to mum when things go wrong, all natural, healthy, protective therapy we use on ourselves. But sometimes we need professionals to guide the talking, to give us release from our own feelings or fears.

Professional counselling is a talking therapy that allows a person to talk about their problems and feelings in a confidential and safe environment.

A counsellor is trained to listen with empathy (by putting themselves in your shoes). They can help you deal with any negative thoughts and feelings that you have. Sometimes, the term counselling is used to refer to talking therapies in general, but counselling is also a specific type of therapy in its own right.

Talking therapies, such as counselling, can be used to treat many different health conditions including: depression, anxiety, borderline personality disorder (BPD), obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), long-term illnesses, eating disorders, such as anorexia nervosa and bulimia and drug misuse.

Counselling aims to help you deal with and overcome issues that are causing pain or making you feel uncomfortable. The counsellor is there to support you and respect your views.

They will not usually give advice, but will help you to find your own insight and understanding of your problems.

Counselling can help you to: cope with a bereavement or relationship breakdown, cope with redundancy or work-related stress, explore issues such as sexual identity, deal with issues that are preventing you from achieving your ambitions, deal with feelings of depression or sadness, and have a more positive outlook on life.

Counselling can often involve talking about difficult or painful feelings and, as you begin to face them, you may feel worse in some ways.

However, with the help and support of your therapist, you should gradually start to feel better. In most cases, it takes a number of sessions before the counselling starts to make a difference, and a regular commitment is required to make the best use of the therapy.

During your counselling sessions, you will be encouraged to express your feelings and emotions freely. By discussing your concerns with you, the counsellor can help you to gain a better understanding of your feelings and thought processes, as well as identifying ways of finding your own solutions to problems.

The counsellor may encourage you to identify issues and, if appropriate, take personal responsibility for them. They will be able to help you recognise the effects of other people and their actions, and explore alternative ways of coping with them.

It can be a great relief to share your worries and fears with someone who acknowledges your feelings and is able to help you reach a positive solution.

A good counsellor will focus on you and listen without judging or criticising you. They may help you find out about how you could deal with your problems, but they should not tell you what to do.

For counselling to be effective, you need to build a trusting and safe relationship with your counsellor. If you feel that you and your counsellor are not getting on, or that you are not getting the most out of your sessions, you should discuss this with your counsellor.

If the situation does not improve, or your counsellor is dismissive or unwilling to discuss the issue, it is perfectly acceptable to look for another counsellor with whom you feel more comfortable.

If you are seeing an NHS counsellor who is attached to your GP surgery, your GP may be able to arrange for you to see another NHS counsellor. Alternatively, you could pay to see a private counsellor. Many counsellors and counselling organisations offer a sliding scale of fees, where the more sessions you have, the cheaper it becomes.