He's cheating - again!

MY husband has had several affairs in the 22 years we’ve been married, but over the last eight years he’s been faithful and I thought things were OK.

He had promised he would never again hurt me like this, so I was bitterly upset as well as surprised when he announced last week that he has been seeing someone else.

He says she is special and that he can’t give her up, but that he doesn’t want to leave me. Should I be fighting to save my marriage or do I just give up? - TL

Fiona says: If you’re prepared to forgive your husband for this latest affair, you should be fighting, but if this is the last straw, maybe you should be calling time on it.

You say he’s had several affairs and promised not to hurt you again - but he has. How many more times can you take being hurt like this? This probably won’t be your husband’s last infidelity.

You need to balance what you get out of this relationship with what it’s costing you - then make your decision. 

He won't pay his share

MY boyfriend and I live together and agreed we’d be sharing the cost of our flat, but I am always the one who pays the bills.

He’s not working and the money he has comes from his parents as he won’t register as unemployed.

He wants to be a film maker and spends most of his time practising with his camera and editing pictures on his computer.

We never go out and he is forever asking me to lend him money, but I resent being used like this and think he should pay his way. - DG

Fiona says: I agree he needs to pay his way. If he’s used to being given money by his parents, he may think your supporting him is perfectly normal.

As long as he thinks he can get by with handouts from his parents and loans from you, he probably sees no reason to change.

I don’t know if your boyfriend is genuinely talented or if he is fooling himself, but surely, he should be at film school if he wants to make a success of this.

I suspect you’re beginning to realise your boyfriend is not the kind of partner you really want.

If that’s the case, it may be time to move on.