WHEN Dave woke up last week he was being bludgeoned over the head with a meat tenderiser.

But what hurt more than his painful injuries was the fact that the person wielding the weapon was a dearly loved friend.

Dave is one of 2,000 devoted carers in Swindon looking after and supporting an alcoholic.

The 54-year-old’s life is little more than a reflection of his friend Tina’s struggles with drink.

“It’s agony,” he said. “In the last four years I have been in Swindon I have felt nothing but isolated, and Tina, the friend I care about most, has constantly betrayed my trust.”

When Tina asked Dave for money to buy sanitary towels last weekend, he knew there was a chance she would return from the shop drunk.

Just an hour after leaving his home the 43-year-old did just that. That night, as they said goodbye, it was watched by two police escorts.

As much as it broke his heart, Dave had to call the police because he was unsure how she would behave.

“To see her in that state is devastating,” said Dave.

“When Tina is sober she is a kind, caring and incredibly loving mother of four wonderful boys. She’s also a very talented artist.

“When she’s had a drink she’s a different person entirely, verbally abusive and capable of serious violence.

“Because of her relationship with alcohol her family have turned their back on her.”

Tina’s life hit a tragic rock-bottom last year when – while on an alcohol binge – she was raped.

“She’s a vulnerable person anyway because she is very petite but when she drinks she puts herself at greater risk and the unspeakable happens,” said Dave.

Tina has also been taken to hospital before after a drinking binge left her out on Swindon’s icy streets where she was found by paramedics suffering from hypothermia.

Had her body been just two degrees colder she would have died there and then.

“It is easy for outsiders to brand alcoholism as a self-inflicted problem and say ‘pull yourself together’ but it is not as simple or straightforward as telling an alcoholic to shape up or ship out,” said Dave.

“It is a crippling addiction, it consumes you and is your entire life.”

And Dave would know. As a recovering alcoholic himself, Dave lived life at the bottom of a glass for five years until a simple everyday sight changed his spiralling life forever.

“I was what they call a functioning alcoholic, I was holding down a job and paying my bills and all with a litre of Scotch inside me every day,” he said.

“But one day I was sitting at the side of the road with half a bottle of booze in my hand when I saw a young mum pushing her baby along in a pushchair and I thought ‘If I drove home tonight, I could kill them’.

“That night I poured my alcohol down the sink instead of my throat.”

Dave has now been caring for Tina for five years and says despite being told to give up on her by countless friends, he will always stand by her.

He said: “It’s hard to explain, but you wouldn’t stand by and watch a vet put down a healthy animal. I can’t stand by and do nothing for Tina when I know I can help her.

“Sadly I think she will only stop when she’s in the ground, but I live and hope she will get that wake up call I did.”

Hidden suffering on a huge scale

THERE are 300 people in Swindon being treated for drug or alcohol abuse every year – a figure, experts say, is just the tip of the iceberg.

“Times that figure by 10 and you’re probably closer to just how many families are suffering,” says Anne Billingham, a Swindon Carers Centre substance misuse carer support worker.

“Drugs and alcohol don’t just create victims from those who are addicted but from their families and friends as well.

“Being a carer does leave you isolated and makes you feel that there is nobody that can help you, but the truth is that while it is sad there are many people in the same boat, it means that there are other people going through the same emotions.

“This means you are not alone.”

Swindon and Wiltshire Alcohol and Drugs Service (SWADS) sees about 300 people annually who have problems with alcohol or addiction and are seeking treatment. The service is run from Banford House, at 13 Milton Road in Swindon, and is open for a drop-in service from 1pm to 2.45pm from Monday to Friday as well as the centre’s open access alcohol group.

The service provides a supported community detox service for alcohol misuse, structured counselling and day programme, holistic therapies including Reiki, reflexology and acupuncture and aftercare support.

“Not all the support services are suitable for everyone,” says Anne.

“What works for one person could be unsuccessful for another, that’s why it’s important that there is plenty on offer.”

A drug treatment drop-in service is held at St Luke’s Church Hall in Broad Street on Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Fridays between 9am and 11am.

The service provides triage services for drug misuse and referrals into treatment, outreach service and home visits, aftercare and complimentary therapies. The service can be contacted on 01793 617177.

Time for Us is a non-judgmental support group for parents whose children are drug users. It meets on the first Monday of every month and it allows parents to talk at ease about coping as carers.

Candle watching is one of the techniques the group uses to relax and is organised by volunteer worker Moya Pinson who has run it for a year.

Moya says too many parents have been left isolated with no support and the group wants more to come along.

For more information, call Moya on 01793 686445.